❖ Video
❖ Audio (Message)
The Risk of Loving
(John 13:21-30)
Mari Ikeda
Today, we will continue reading from the Gospel of John. Today’s passage is from chapter 13, verses 21-30. Let’s begin reading right away. Today, I would like to read through the entire passage first.
21 After he had said this, Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified, “Very truly I tell you, one of you is going to betray me.” 22 His disciples stared at one another, at a loss to know which of them he meant. 23 One of them, the disciple whom Jesus loved, was reclining next to him. 24 Simon Peter motioned to this disciple and said, “Ask him which one he means.” 25 Leaning back against Jesus, he asked him, “Lord, who is it?” 26 Jesus answered, “It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish.” Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot. 27 As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him. So Jesus told him, “What you are about to do, do quickly.” 28 But no one at the meal understood why Jesus said this to him. 29 Since Judas had charge of the money, some thought Jesus was telling him to buy what was needed for the festival, or to give something to the poor. 30 As soon as Judas had taken the bread, he went out. And it was night.
A. Weakness of the human heart
It is well known that Judas betrayed Jesus. Jesus knew in advance that Judas would betray him, and he indirectly revealed this fact during his last meal with his twelve disciples, including Judas. This is recorded not only in the Gospel of John, but also in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, and Luke. What is common to all four Gospels is the record that none of the disciples, even after hearing Jesus’ hint, ever suspected that Judas would betray him. In the Gospel of John we just read, there is even an episode where Peter signals to another disciple to ask Jesus who the betrayer is, but neither Peter nor the disciple understood Jesus’ answer. This shows how much Judas was trusted and loved by the other disciples.
However, Judas betrayed him. The Bible does not explain why Judas betrayed Jesus, so we can only guess. At least, it is certain that Jesus chose him as one of the twelve disciples, and Judas himself must have initially followed Jesus with admiration. Additionally, from the passage we read today, we learn that he was responsible for managing the finances. However, at some point, Judas’s heart began to fill with doubt and disappointment toward Jesus. This doubt and disappointment eventually led to Jesus’ arrest and execution. After Jesus’ death, Judas regretted his choice and took his own life.
We all have something in common with Judas. We praise and even worship others as long as they benefit us, but when we decide they no longer do, we quickly turn our praise and worship into criticism and rejection. We then discard the trust we had built up and blame the other person, justifying our actions. We are more self-centered and cruel than we realize. And the devil rejoices in and exploits such sins of ours. Even if we later realize that our actions were wrong, like Judas, we may have already brought about an irreversible situation. We are too insensitive to our own self-centeredness and coldness. That is the weakness of our hearts and our sin.
However, Jesus was crucified precisely for those of us who have weak hearts like Judas. From here, I would like to consider today’s passage from Jesus’ perspective.
B. The risk of loving
1. In Jesus’ case
In verse 21 at the beginning of today’s passage, it says that Jesus “was troubled in spirit and testified.” I think that even though Jesus knew that there was no way to avoid Judas betraying him, he was still upset and saddened by it.
Furthermore, the act of dipping a piece of bread and giving it to Judas may have been Jesus’ final appeal to Judas. This was because it was an act of showing affection to the other person at the table. I think Jesus was trying to convey that even if Judas’ heart had changed, Jesus still loved him. If Judas still had any hesitation, he might have been moved by Jesus offering him the piece of bread. However, in reality, Judas accepted the piece of bread without hesitation. Therefore, I think Jesus realized that his words no longer reached Judas. That is why he told Judas, “What you are about to do, do quickly.”
Jesus’ attitude toward Judas demonstrates the full meaning of the cross. Jesus’ coming into this world signifies that God reached out to us, who had turned our backs on Him. And Jesus’ death on the cross means that He took our place so that we, who had turned our backs on God, would not perish in our sins.
In this way, Jesus taught us what true, unconditional love is. Jesus’ love is a love that continues to pour out and never gives up, even when His voice does not reach us, even when we reject Him. Moreover, Jesus did not seek to control us, but respected our freedom, even when it meant He Himself would be hurt. Jesus accepted the risk of being hurt by loving us. In fact, it might be more accurate to say that, for Jesus, we were more precious to Him than His own life, so He did not consider being hurt or suffering to be a risk.
2. In our case
So, what about us? Having come to know the love of Jesus, we have been given the mission of spreading that love throughout the world. When we try to love others as Jesus loved us, we also take on the risks that come with loving. These include our sincerity not being understood, our pure goodwill being rejected, and being betrayed.
Recently, I had an experience at the shelter where I work on weekdays in which my sincerity did not seem to get through to someone. The person in question was a woman in her 30s who had suffered years of abuse from her parents. Let’s call her Megumi. Due to her mental state deteriorating, she had come to refuse all contact with various welfare workers, becoming distrustful and hostile toward them. However, she had spoken with me before this happened and trusted me, saying she wanted to talk with me. Because I knew how difficult her condition was, I thought that her trust in me was just superficial and that talking to her wouldn’t change much. But I thought, “If Jesus would use me even a little bit,” so I decided to try to connect with her. Since she said she couldn’t talk face-to-face, we talked on the phone. But after talking for two hours the first time and nearly three hours the second time, I gave up. No matter how sincerely I spoke, Megumi blamed all the deterioration of her mental state on us. The conversation went in circles, and when I tried to end the call, she accused me of trying to cut ties and refused to let me hang up. In the end, I had to forcefully end the call. I truly tried to listen with sincerity, but it didn’t come across at all, and it was very painful. However, I reflected on my own arrogance. The issues she was dealing with were not something that could be resolved through a few interactions and a few hours of phone calls. If I was of any help to her, it was only that by ending our interactions, she felt cornered and chose to seek police protection and be hospitalized.
I once read something Mother Teresa said about how, when you practice love to the point of being hurt, strangely enough, that love does not disappear but becomes inexhaustible. That is what Jesus’ love is like. My practice may not even amount to a millionth of Jesus’ love, but I can relate Mother Teresa’s words in the sense that I truly believe that Jesus loves Megumi, even if my words do not reach her.
Nevertheless, my practice is limited to my work at the shelter, so I believe it differs from the practice involved in relationships with family and friends. The deeper the relationship, the greater the damage when our sincerity is not received or rejected by the other person. Yet, we should respect the other person’s freedom, refrain from trying to control them, and continue to love them. The fruits of such efforts may only become apparent much later. What we can do is accept being transformed by the Holy Spirit, so that we do not hinder the love of Jesus Christ from flowing through us.
It is Jesus who gives us an inexhaustible fountain of love and joy in our hearts. Jesus Himself is that fountain. Even if our own love is lacking and our hearts are narrow, it is okay. Let us rely on Jesus and seek help from the Holy Spirit to continue loving God and people in this world.
(Prayer) Lord Jesus, we wonder how much pain You must feel for our sins and weaknesses. You desire for us to live in Your love, loving You and one another. Yet, our daily lives are filled with competition and strife, causing You sorrow. Please pour out Your Spirit upon us and transform us. Enable us to continue sharing Your love with the world. This week marks the 80th anniversary of the end of World War II. Please guide each of our daily decisions so that we may never repeat the mistake of war, and so that we may not make foolish choices. We pray that the wars continuing around the world may end as soon as possible. Please help us. Lord Jesus, we pray in Your name. Amen.
Summary
Judas was trusted and loved by both Jesus and the other disciples, so only Jesus could have foreseen his betrayal. Jesus’ final words to Judas were filled with love and sorrow for him. They foreshadowed that Jesus would take upon Himself the sins of all of us, who are as weak-hearted as Judas, by being crucified on the cross. Jesus experienced the pain of His love being rejected and betrayed. Loving others involves the risk of being hurt in such a way. However, continuing to love others even when being hurt is the love of the cross, and it is the mission entrusted to us who believe in it.
For Discussion
1) What do we have in common with Judas?
2) Please share your experiences of hurting others or being hurt by others because of your love for them.